Saturday, December 15, 2012

Geek Media: kili has - sadly - made me succumb to my inner fangirl


There are any number of things I can and will eventually talk about when it comes to The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (Or as I call it, Hobbit Pt. 1).

But the first that I write with some immediacy, mostly because I give fandom about a 48 hour turnover rate before FFN and many many MANY other fanfiction websites becomes overloaded, overrun even, with Kili/Mary Sue tale.

Yes... Kili/OC. That will be explained... eventually.

And before I go much further... let it be known that any and ALL Hobbit-related tales, critiques, analysis and stories... WILL include all manner of spoilers from both the Book-verse and the Movie-verse.

And I can't even say you're safe from LOTR spoilers here... because you won't be. Frankly speaking.

Okay... so Gimli from The Lord of the Rings was (and in some ways still is) how I mostly envisioned dwarves to look like as a general principle. That is to say, they're stocky, thick, round-faced and all forms of battered and beat up.

So when they announced that they were doing The Hobbit, I had essentially envisioned the 13 dwarves in the movie... to look like this in some form or fashion.


(Please note this was me randomly colouring the dwarves hair for the most part outside of Gloin, Balin and Thorin as it relates to the movies. Otherwise, no form of canon was consulted in the making of this)

 Boy... was I ever wrong about that...


Now, Thorin Oakenshield will have his discussion both in terms of appearance and personality in a comparable "how does he differ book to movie" for me... but let's get back to the crux of the situation here.

So this past summer, they released all of the above character portraits of the 13 dwarves of Erebor. And one in particular caught my eye.

Oh, what? Who's this? was my precise reaction. I mean, no way this guy is a dwarf, much less one of the 13. 

Firstly, he carries bows and arrows. BOWS AND ARROWS. Like some pretty little elf this side of the Misty Mountains for heaven's sakes.

What self respecting dwarf doesn't go for face to face combat? 

Not this one apparently.

Also... none of the chubby cheeks and sturdy build for this dude, nor ugly, stringy hair. No he's slim, he's sexy and he has that angry, don't-give-a-damn look of his down pat. Oh and the hair... very pet-able. XD

Basically, he looks less like a dwarf and more like some other dude I know all too well from the LOTR-verse that follows the events of the Hobbit, and that I have spent many a day obsessing over as a teenager and even now.


Yeaaaaaah... I definitely get more the ranger-y feel from this dwarf.

But I digress. The question here is "who is he?"

To speak in the grandiose nature of Gandalf the Grey, why he is Kili, brother to Fili and nephew of Thorin Oakenshield, bourne of Thorin's own sister. He and his brother are the youngest to take part in the expedition to take back Erebor and is perhaps part of the reason why they both look... well, less like dwarves, more like young men perhaps.

Or in Kili's case, stands as a reasonable excuse as to why his "dwarf beard" amounts to little more than the length of ass-hairs. Seriously, dwarves have beards. What Kili had was too many days without his razor.

Also, the fact that movie!Thorin himself is rather human-like - and good looking to boot - in appearance (although if as much was ever said to the book-canon Thorin he would have strangled you with his bare hands) and the whole family relation thing probably justifies it.


Actually, now that I think of it, Thorin himself has a beard that amounts to little more than nothing in dwarf terms. That stubble ain't a true dwarf beard...

Jesus the things P.J. does to canon - presumed canon anyway - to keep these dwarf men attractive...



Here's the thing though: Kili (and Fili) are about as insignificant a dwarf character as they came in The Hobbit. They rarely spoke, and they didn't really do much of note for the company besides just... was there.

No that's a lie. Their most notable feat was that THEY DIED during the Battle of the Five Armies.

So it is for that reason that I sat their and said, "Well he's cute, but I'm not going to crush on him, he has no real character background, he's insignificant... no no no no no no..."

All summer it was like that.

Little did I know, Peter Jackson gave him the "Legolas" treatment.

That is to say, raised the profile of the pretty faced, minor character to give someone (other than Figwit - who yes, WAS in the movie) for fangirls to swoon over and pine for. He was front and centre for so many major events... most prominently the Trollshaws and then the reindeer bunnies part (don't ask).

And as much as I hate to admit it... I swooned. Hard.

I tried, I really did. But I couldn't help it, my eyes betrayed me, drawn to the nice looking dwarf that reminds me so much of my beloved Aragorn in appearance (in character nature he was far closer to a Merry or Pippin though)

Part of me just didn't want to fall for him for his looks. The other part is that I wanted a character with meaning too, like in the case of Aragorn over Legolas in the original trilogy.

And yet another part of me just simply didn't want to end up in tears after the end of the Battle of Five Armies. (Although to be frank, I will be in tears at the end of Five Armies. Because unlike in The Lord of the Rings... major, important and much loved characters WILL DIE... and not just Kili)

But while watching the film, a character appeared that I adored: a mischievous, playful but tough little dwarf who grew up as bit of an idealistic adventure-lover in the Blue Mountains. He's rash though, a bit careless and somewhat silly but a loyal dwarf unlike any other who will risk life and limb for those he cares for, like Bilbo. He loves to smile and laugh, but in the midst of battle he can take on a bit of a battle rage not unlike his uncle... though certainly not as intense.

What really separates him from the others is that he of all of them truly expressed the fact that he was eager to live, and has yet to feed from the same bitter trough that had hardened and hurt the heart of his uncle Thorin.

Look at that grin. HOW CAN YOU NOT ADORE THAT???

Crap. I think writing this has led to me being bitten by a plot-bunny. Something to do with Fili. And Kili. And origins.